Friday, August 7, 2015

The Road to Recovery

Hey guys!  It's me again.  I know it's been quite some time since I last posted on here.  I figured it was about time to give another update on our journey.  It's hard to believe that it's already been well over 2 years since we miscarried & lost our precious little Taylor Lee.  At the same time, it's hard to believe it's been over 2 years and we're still in the camp of trying to get pregnant again.  I've finally come to terms with the fact that we're struggling with infertility.  There, I said it.  Infertility.  It's such a scary word.  A label you never hope to have.  But we're here in the midst of it, facing it head-on, clinging to our hope in Christ, taking each new step that is presented in front of us.  Trying to embrace the emotions that come with this journey, leaning on our faith, our family & our friends when the hard days hit, but also rejoicing with others who have been able to bring new, beautiful life into this world, despite our struggle. And mourning with friends who have lost little babies way too early. 

I know that we can make it look like our lives are perfect.  We've got a great relationship, amazing family & friends & over-all life is good.  No matter the struggle we're in.  Life is good.  God is good.  We're incredibly blessed beyond measure.  Even though our hearts ache as we walk through this trial, we still trust that the Lord knows what he is doing & that he's got our best in mind.  We know that just because we want to have a family & desire to have children, that it's not something we're guaranteed.  No one is.  It's an incredible blessing though.  Life is just so precious!  

I've shared bits & pieces of our journey.  At times it's hard to open up about it.  It's hard to let people in to such a vulnerable part of our lives.  But I feel like those who walk down this road, whether having had miscarriages, struggling to get pregnant, or whatever it might be, there's a sense of shame that can come with it.  And I want to share our story to help bring that out in the light.  There is no shame in it.  There's something freeing about telling your story.  It doesn't make it any easier, but I feel like it helps to lift the burden.  It's a beautiful thing to see others come around you to support you & show that they care.  They are there to help lift your hands up when you can't do it alone. Sometimes it seems easier to just put your best face forward & pretend that everything is ok, even when there's a deep pain in your heart.  That's when we need to press into our Savior, & let others be the love of Christ to us.

Some of you know our story about Taylor Lee.  If not, click on the link to read about our precious baby.  Since then, I've seen multiple doctors, had multiple tests done & have now gone through my 2nd procedure.  I'll post another time about how we got to this point.

A week ago today I was put under & had a fairly invasive surgery done, where 3 fibriods, 2 cysts & some other "stuff" (I'll call it that now, as I'm still not 100% sure what the "stuff" was, lol!) was removed from my uterus & ovaries.  The biggest & most intruding fibriod on my uterus was over 6 cm (which I just found out was actually bigger than my uterus!).  That's a pretty big deal.  It was in the lining of my uterus, pushing into it & causing some trouble.  I haven't felt "great" for a while now & am quite convinced that the fibroids contributed to that!  If nothing else, I'm excited to feel better!

We've met with a fertility specialist & will go back to see him after I'm all healed up.  We're hopeful that this might be the answer to some of our issues & will continue to pray that the Lord will lead us as we continue this journey of life.  We covet your prayers as well!  We know we can't get through this without the support of others.  That's what community is all about.

Anyway, here's my new bracelet that I'm going to be wearing a LOT!
The pave "T" for Taylor & the word script "believe" with the fun Time Key.  I look at my watch a LOT, so this is going to be a great reminder for me to continue to believe we will see Taylor face to face when we meet our Savior in Heaven some day.  And to also remind me to keep on believing that God has a plan for us & knows what's best for us, even when it may not make sense to us!  One of my favorite versus is in Isaiah 55, verses 8 & 9: 
8“My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord.
“And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.
9For just as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so my ways are higher than your ways
and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.

Monday, January 26, 2015

Around the House - Office makeover!

So we spent a good chunk of the day yesterday working on our office.  It was in desperate need of some TLC and TLC is what we gave it!  We moved the desk around & put it up against the wall.  While it was fun to have it in the middle of the room & be able to look out while on the computer, it was taking up a LOT of space!   And can we just talk about this deer painting?!  Our friend Nick painted it for us - we still love it!  Check out his work through the link :D
I scored this fun roll-top desk from a friend & love having it in the office!  One of these days I will get around to painting it :D  I love chalk paint!!  Here are a couple of other projects I've worked on, using chalk paint
I'm notorious for killing plants - for what ever reason I just can't keep them alive in the house.  The only one's that have survived are an orchid that has not bloomed for 2+ years (but the leaves are still green, so we keep feeding it the ice it needs once a week ;) ), and the random basil plants I had growing in my kitchen (btw - mom & Tracey, are they still alive?!).  So, hopefully this beauty of a lilly will survive!  So far, after one day, she's doing great & LOVING her new living arrangements :)
Who else has a gallery wall in their house?!  I love ours!!  Just some random b & w pictures, some with very special meaning to us :)  We had the little rocking chair down in the basement, in one of our spare rooms down there.  When the hubbs mentioned he'd love a "reading nook" in the re-decorated office, I knew exactly what to put there.  I know the chair isn't super fancy or cute, but it used to be my grandma & grandpa's, so again, it holds special meaning to me :)  And the lamp was from their house as well :)  That little table doesn't really hold any special meaning, but she too will be painted one of these days!!!  Stay tuned ;)

You might recognize the shelves & picture from a previous post - this wall has sure changed a lot since then! 

I'll post more after I paint the table & the desk :D


Thursday, January 15, 2015

DIY Chalk Paint Coffee table

I love the way this table turned out!  I originally found it at a garage sale for a great price.  $20.  Bam!  I made my own chalk paint to use on it & tried to sell it at Tin Can Alley.  But, it just wasn't selling.  It's not in perfect shape, but that's what makes it perfect!  My mom came to my rescue and added a dark glaze to it, which I think has made all the difference.  Since it didn't sell, I decided to just bring it home and use it in my house - and it's perfect!

Yes, I did take that picture with my cell phone and I know, the lighting is terrible.  But, you get the gist of it ;)  I love how it turned out!  Thanks mom for your assistance!!